Daily Gratitude: I love this. It’s a corollary to the Golden Rule. Can you think of people you miss and why you miss them? What qualities did they have that made you feel something positive – loving , caring, attentive, intelligent, listening, fun, always knowing the right thing to say, etc? If you miss them, it would behoove you to figure out why and then try to emulate them abd these virtues in your every day life. Make a list of their qualities and characteristics. Check off the ones you already have and then focus on the ones that are left and figure out how to develop them in you. Keep working at it because although it’s simple it’s not easy.
Daily Gratitude: I’ve discovered something magical. However, it’s also very strange. In working with the folks who are making their transition, I’m finding myself mesmerized by one special thing about each of them. One man’s simple phrase (“why me?”) created surprise and passion in me and ensured that I will never forget him. Why? Because as I’ve written, his “why me” was not the “poor me” that you generally expect but the “why do I deserve all these blessings?” Another man’s smile has me in love with him in a way I’ve never felt before. It’s as if that smile is saying “you are a part of me and i, of you”. That is the greatest gift of communion that anyone could ever receive or ask for. And now there’s a woman who looks so deeply into my eyes that I feel as if I’m back in New York City in the subway, staring down the darkened tracks. I can see the light of the train coming my way, inviting me to peer more deeply into what’s there in the darkness. How can you refuse such an invitation? I can’t. And I feel honored that each of these people is sharing something very special with me at the end of their lives. We often tend to look at the external effects of dying – the immense weight loss and loss of strength and stamina. But these are just external “clothes” and if we only see and focus on that, we’ll miss so much. The essence of that person is still with us to be shared with the world. Instead of the losses, we need to take a moment to cherish the gains that come with death. There is a freedom of sorts and if you let them, these people still have so much to give. Rejoice and receive what they are offering.
Daily Gratitude: How much patience do you have right now? I bet it isn’t a lot. Times of stress seem to decrease the supply of patience we may have previously accrued. Acknowledging this fact is important, not just for your own understanding but also for those who are around you. What if you were to open up to those around you and tell them your patience tank is running on empty? Tell them that they shouldn’t take anything you say personally. Maybe even consider asking them for help. Maybe they could let you know when something you’ve done bothers them. That might allow you the time and examples you need in order to examine your inner self to see what’s missing and what’s needed. Enlist the help of others and it becomes a team project. That requires you to be vulnerable but it also allows you (and the others) to be part of the team. And whether we admit it or not, we all want to be on a team. Otherwise those childhood memories of being last to be picked to join the others wouldn’t be so painful. Opening up to others keeps you both alert and may help keep you from doing something stupid in the future. Build your patience muscles by allowing others inside. Scary huh? But it does help. A lot.
