Daily Gratitude: “There is no better teacher than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time.”

It’s interesting that if you look around you, you can find messages and lessons about whatever situation you’re going through.

Such is the case with me right now. To be fair though it’s always been like that for me. However I haven’t always had my eyes open enough to see what the universe has been shoving in my face.

My eyes are open now for sure. It turns out that I have one if not two compression fractures in my thoracic vertebra – my mid back.

I am grateful that I had the wisdom to drop from the race because who knows how much worse they might Have gotten. That doesn’t help me not feel like a wimp though.

Right now adversity is staring me in the face. But i have to listen to my own messages and see how I can make this seemingly big obstacle just like the speed bumps in my neighborhood.

First of all i need to define the problem and issues. And to make it. Less oppressive it’s wise to limit the scope. In the past I would already be having myself in a nursing home in constant pain for the rest of my life. But that does no good at all. The primary issue right now is to do whatever I’m told in order to heal. Fortunately my tens unit is doing its job right now.

Second is to put everything in its proper perspective and designate a compartment for each question or issue. It’s essential that I realize I cannot predict the future. I could spend so much time on that and all it would do is to mess up my nervous system.

Sure I’ve been wondering what this will do to my love for ultra walking and maybe walking in general. The way I’m dealing with this is to remind myself I am strong and people have overcome much worse problems Than this. Then I am doing my best to put any fear about it in a box. I can also use my love for and desire to walk as motivation as long as I’m willing to just wait and see without hanging too many hopes to that one thing.

Third is to figure out everything else I can do given my present condition.

For the last 8 days I haven’t done much. I’ve done the daily calls and the daily gratitudes I write and some reading. But mostly I’ve slept or just played games. In the past I would have criticized myself for this but i know i have needed this down time and it’s ok. That’s a big but essential change for me.

It’s key to take everything gradually and not rush anything.

When it’s time I will work on my writing and some gentle exercises once I’m cleared to do that.

Fourth is to spend a lot of time calming my nervous system with meditation and journaling as well as keeping myself from thinking about the future.

And fifth for me anyway is to pay attention to my parts. Why? Because they are frightened and predicting the worst. I need to reassure them and make them a part of the process. I was surprised yesterday when I was doing an IFS Meditaroin when I found 6 new parts that immediately came forth expressing concerns about our situation. I was surprised but happy because this gives me plenty to work with. That will help with all of the previous steps.

This has been about me but it’s methods I recommend for anyone facing adversity. I know this will make me a better person and it can work for you too.

Daily Gratitude: “HAPPINESS is equal to reality minus expectations.”

Isn’t this a different perspective on happiness? I like it though and if we examine it, we’ll see that it’s true.

So often we hope for (expect) something to turn out a certain way. We then focus on that outcome. If things happen in a positive and good way BUT don’t end up happening like we expected them to, then the degree of happiness we have is muted compared to what it would have been if we hadn’t had any hopes or expectations.

Can you remember any instances in your life where this played out? I can.

Let’s say you’re really looking forward to a vacation so you can rest a lot and spend time with your family. You see yourself out hiking or sitting on the beach or shopping in quaint stores.

Turns out it rained or snowed or was cold the whole time you were on vacation. You didn’t get any time hiking or sitting on the beach. The vacation didn’t meet your expectations. But wait a minute – it didn’t meet all your expectations but the first thing I wrote above when I mentioned the vacation was that you could rest and spend time with your family. You got to do all that and maybe got even more of each since you couldn’t go do the other stuff. If you didn’t let your expectations rule your happiness, you’d be really happy with the results. But because of the expectations, your mind discounts the good parts and your vacation is deemed “not so good”, “horrible” or maybe “OK”.

Remember this the next time you set expectations on something. Anything.

Daily Gratitude: “We are more often frightened than hurt; and we suffer more from imagination than from reality.”

Wow this is so profound. Each part has gold in it.

Fear manifests itself as hurt because it’s also more “acceptable” to tell someone you’re hurt than it is to say “I’m scared”.

And the imagination part is key. Our imaginations are powerful even when you think you’re not a creative person. Just think about a slight pain you have or had. Pretty soon, it increases. And it’s not long before the worst possible outcome is there in the front of your mind.

In 2025 at Vol State I felt this sharp shooting pain in my foot. Every step i took was like an electrical shock in my foot and up my leg. I can tell you that within 10 steps I had at least 5 major things wrong with my foot.

By the time I was able to hobble over to a place to sit, I was sure my race was over. And of course, all the attendant emotions floated up with that thought.

Turns out it was a metal strip that had somehow punctured the sole of my shoe and gone through the insert and up into my foot. Once it was removed my foot was fine. But my imagination took off prior to having all the facts. Of course that’s a survival mechanism we humans have. If we waited to have all the facts before we acted, we’d get eaten by the big tiger pursuing us.

We just have to recognize these facts and take our time before losing control of our responses. It was a good lesson for me.