I’ve been wanting to write about this for the longest time. Today seemed fitting for two reasons:
1) My question of the day was “who are the most influential people in my life and why?”, and
2) She was just recently recognized with a very special award by an Australian Ultra Running Association (I’m sure I have the name wrong).

So what is it about Marie that makes her so important to me?

I met her in 2013 at my first 72 hour race. We passed each other many times and I had a wonderful opportunity to watch her in action, both as an ultrarunner and as a human being. I was in awe of both.

the next time we ran into each other was at Across the Years (don’t remember if it was 2013 or 2014 but it doesn’t matter). She helped me by getting me water and by cheering me on. Another glimpse into this very elite runner and woman.

Since then we’ve been “friends” and then friends (that’s what happens sometimes with Facebook friends). I think the transition came on “Day 5” – that’s what we affectionately call the 2 days (or was it more) that she spent crewing me in my attempted trek across the US. She drove for hours to come help me and endured worse conditions perhaps than even I did. Without her, I would not have been able to get very far in California because the police would not have let me pass with my cart. And that same day, she stood in the pouring rain to wait for me at periodic stops to feed me and make sure i was ok. She even spotted a crisis and came to the rescue. The expensive rain jacket I started with got holes on the first day and by the time I was with Marie, I was soaked and freezing. She sped off to find a sports store where she got me a perfect rain jacket that I still use today. I couldn’t have asked for better support. You might think that this has made me biased and maybe it has but I bet if you ask anyone else about her, they will agree with all i write here.

She is always engaged and supportive. It’s obvious she cares about people and what they are going through. Her nursing experience shows through in almost every interaction – and I don’t mean by offering medical advice, although that is always spot on too. But nurses are the ones who help patients heal. Doctors just write down things they think will help, but it’s the nurses who get the patients to understand and to buy-in to the diagnosis, the prognosis and helps them find the motivation to do what they have to help the miraculous machine they inhabit get well. Nurses are the ones who spend 98% of the time with the patient. They can make or break any medical encounter. In order to do that they have to have compassion and understanding. They have to recognize that everyone is different and comes from different circumstances and they have to adjust all their discussions to each individual. They don’t have biases or if they do, they never let it show. They don’t judge people. They help people and are there for them.

I could go on and on about nurses and maybe I should in another post. But that’s just the flavor for you to know how Marie is with every single person I’ve seen her interact with. This is not to say she’s a pansy. That is most definitely NOT the case. and that’s one of the other things I admire about her – She is the most gentle tough person I’ve ever met. It’s hard to be both but she has mastered the entire range of resilience.

She never complains or if she does, she is not really complaining. She only opens her mouth when she has a solution to what isn’t sitting well with her. This is a unique quality. Her solutions are also unique because they involve do-able things, not pie in the sky ideas like “well, if the government did this, we wouldn’t have that”. I remember two years ago we were having dinner and the portions were monstrous. She had really practical ideas about that and told several people but not in a nosy, busy body way. She approaches everyone as if they are doing their best and she just wants to share something. To watch the reception of this mannerism is better than watching Netflix.

She’s extremely good at giving individual advice WITH alternatives, knowing that a) people are different and b) many people’s automatic response is rejection or excuse. Since she knows that and doesn’t judge it, she comes at the problem from multiple directions with many variables. This ensures that if someone really wants help, they have an array of choices. If asked for elaboration, she’s there with studies, evidence or just admits it’s worked for her and others she’s known even if they don’t know why.

You never know when things are rough for her. She doesn’t want to burden others with that information. She is strong physically, emotionally, and mentally.

I tried pretty hard to find something negative or something about her that I wouldn’t want to cultivate in my life. I could find NOTHING.

 I bet you expected me to put a question here, didn’t you?

Well, the question is just “what is YOUR question of the day?”

I’ve adopted a new practice of deciding each morning what would be an important question for me to ponder that day. Not something like “oh my, what should I wear today?” but a more in depth type of question.

Before you groan and mutter “I don’t have time to spend on answering a dumb vague question”, hear me out.

I’m not suggesting you spend time contemplating your question as you contemplate your navel, although feel free to do that.

What I am saying is to simply take a minute or two to look beyond the day and think of a question that involves your life in general. Just come up with question, write (or type) it down and then let it sit in your mind. You don’t have to do anything else on a conscious level. Your brain is powerful enough it can ponder this while keeping you breathing, your blood flowing and your kids picked up. You may never officially answer the question. But the seed will be planted.

Try it for a day or two and see what comes up.

Here’s some examples:

“Do I want to continue doing all these long distance runs and more importantly train for them or is it time for me to move on to something else.” Notice i didn’t even include any question about “what else” might there be.

“Am I doing what I want to be doing most of the time? How do I feel about my days?” Ok so that’s two questions. You can make it one just by sticking an “and” in there.

“Is there something I really want to do before I die?”

“Are there people I need and want to make amends with?”

“What is my strongest quality?”

“What is my greatest weakness?”

“Who is someone that I know and really admire and why?” See, there, i put the “and” in.

“What subjects would I like to learn more about?”

“Can I sit still or do I have to be busy all the time?”

There are so many things we can ask our inner selves to think about. I imagine you’ll be surprised if you do this for awhile. You’ll most likely find yourself wanting to do more and live your life to a greater degree. Or maybe to give more to other people. Or, you may realize how happy you are with what you have and you don’t want to change anything. Only you will know the results.

 Who doesn’t think puppies are cute?

Most people will agree and if they are allergic or have some other aversion, they might secretly think that at least they are adorable in pictures.

I’ve been watching 3 litters of Huskies in the past 2 weeks – what a blessing. I don’t think I’ve smiled that much in a long time.

People are like puppies once you remove their camouflage.

A puppy has only one goal. To get to mom and get her love and nourishment. You can tell that nothing else matters. If you sit with yourself and remove all external stimuli, I think you’ll realize that is also your PRIMARY goal. We just seem to have so much other garbage that gets in the way.

Puppies surprisingly are very dependent. Their eyes aren’t even open for about 2-3 weeks! They can’t poop or pee on their own. They need mama’s stimulation for that (I don’t think they care either – until, of course, it hurts too much..lol). Horses, on the other hand, can see and even walk almost immediately at birth.

Even at my own old age and with my previous puppy experience, I didn’t know those facts. It’s amazing they survive in the “wild”. Thank goodness for mothers.

It’s not that we humans need help pooping and peeing – most parents are probably laughing at this. Infants have absolutely no problem performing their bodily functions. But, we are dependent in so many other ways – often ways we don’t want to admit.

Often our eyes aren’t open either. The eyelids might be but is there a connection there between the outside world and the brain? The eyes don’t see, they just carry signals (another neural circuit – you’ve heard me talk a lot about neural circuits). The brain receives the signals and then interprets those signals. That’s where things get individual. What I see may not be what you see because you don’t have the same framework I do. You haven’t been to all the places I’ve been and vice versa. I wasn’t taught the same things you were.

Puppies squirm and crawl all over anything and anyone including their family members. It’s not that they want to hurt anyone else, they just are focused on one thing – getting to the milk and warmth that mama provides.

People squirm and crawl all over anything and anyone including their family members. Sometimes, though, they do hurt others, but really deep down, in the majority of the cases, they don’t do that intentionally. We may not realize that, again because of the experiences we have. In actuality, though, we are all after the same thing – love and nourishment – physical, emotional and mental nourishment.

Puppies and people just want to cuddle. Before you cringe and go “oh no, not me, I don’t like to be touched” realize that this is your camouflage. It’s all about love!

A word about camouflage – we don’t always choose our camouflage. Often the first layers are applied by our parents, siblings, peers, teachers, religious figures and media. Unfortunately we don’t have a lot of choice about that layer. By the time we get to where we can pick our wardrobe, that feels great. But, you don’t realize that you have those base layers and now you’re hiding them. They are still there though. When you get hot (things are not going so well), you may not understand that you have to shed some of those base layers just as we do in Texas – where it’s 40 degrees in the morning and 80 by 2 in the afternoon. But the layer issue is for another post.

Be a puppy!

(I bet you expected my photo to be of puppies..Sorry to disappoint but if I had puppy pictures, I wouldn’t have time to be posting)