There are no bad audiences–only audiences on a different level.

Nobody wants someone yelling in your face when you’re tired, no matter how happily they yell. You can’t shove RAH RAH RAH down peoples’ throats, as many a corporate team-building day has proven.
 
So what do you do? meet them where they are.

Don’t try to drum up energy that isn’t there. Instead, start soft. Start small.

Gradually, the energy of the shared space rises, bringing the audience and performers up together. The show is more precise and less flamboyant. And love them as hard as you can

When someone cuts me off in traffic: I wonder if his wife is giving birth in the backseat of that Ferrari? Or maybe his Tesla?

 
This reminds me of the difference between a caller and a listener. One is not any better Than the other. Both are extremely valuable. And I am so appreciative of all of you!

So what’s the difference?

To me everyone is a listener because everyone is listening to the message.

A caller, again to me, is someone who leaves a message.

I should clarify that saying “hi” is a message. I don’t think you all understand how important and powerful just that one word can be. You don’t have to leave some brilliant thought. Just saying “hi” lets me know that you’re a listener AND a caller.

With the system I use i have no idea how many people call only how many leave messages.

Of course you don’t have to leave any message. Just know that it means so much to me.

When you leave messages you get to be on the weekly roundup too. After all, we can’t let Karin steal the show all the time can we?

Be sure to listen in tomorrow for a very special message.

Have a diamond day

What I learned in my writing workshop last week.

The workshop I took last week was probably the best I’ve ever had. Yes it was about writing and the teacher is just amazing.

But as I have had time to process the experience, I found that the reason it excelled had nothing really to do with writing.

Huh?

Let me explain. This was a total of 17 1/2 hours of learning. Being that I’m 77 years old, you can imagine I’ve been exposed to a lot of learning experiences.

For me they are usually associated with tremendous anxiety and I’m constantly wary of having to speak up or tell about “how things went”, answer questions, or take tests of some sort. The worst ones are those with practical exercises that everyone has to participate in.

I learn very little in those courses and I just sit and sweat (figuratively and sometimes literally) watching the minutes and hours tick by until it’s over.

I had none of that last week.

Why?

Because the teacher gave us freedom. She said we could do the exercises – and there were several- then or at another time. She would even say at the beginning of the next one that we could continue to work on the previous one.

At the end of the day she gave us suggested assignments but didn’t require us to turn them in or report on them if we didn’t want to.

There was plenty of opportunity to speak up about what we did or ask questions.

I felt great the entire week and it was – as I realized later- because I had the freedom to be me. My creativity was through the roof and my retention was unbelievable. All because I didn’t have to perform.

Performance is such an intense pressure on people and yet we don’t even realize it anymore because it’s usually pressure on the teacher AND the student. When one feels the need to perform, it’s transferred on to the student.

Then everyone has anxiety and I’ve talked many times about the effects of anxiety on the brain. That the functioning of the frontal lobe is diminished. With the anxiety response the flight or freeze response is triggered and with anger the fight response is.

When the frontal lobe doesn’t work, learning is essentially cut off. Isn’t it interesting that the thing that is intended to promote learning actually hinders it. What a shame.

How can you take this fact and my experience and apply it to your everyday personal and professional life?

Just think about it- nowadays even asking how are you had a hidden agenda and is performance based. When asked that, you know that the other person is just being polite and most of the time doesn’t really care how you’re doing.

What things do you say to your kids, your spouse or your friends that expect some sort of response that once dissected may actually be performance based.

Take some time to examine your language AND consider asking the person you’re talking to how they feel when asked certain things.