Daily Gratitude: Ever wonder where those extra pounds came from? Were they hidden at the bottom of the grocery bag (in some ways maybe they were). Did they slip in with all the junk mail you get? “I know I didn’t eat that much at the party” you mutter indignantly “what happened?” Same thing with stress effects. “I can see why Susie and Billy have all those aches and pains. Just look at their hectic lives. But that’s not me. No way”. Well perhaps you should do a little more self-reflection. You know those “food apps” (you know they are really guilt apps) where they ask you to t track everything you put in your mouth. Have you ever used one? I looked up stress trackers in the App Store and most of them focused on HRV (heart rate variability), which is probably ok as it’s an objective measure. But I know i was seeing my HRV (unsolicited) when I was tracking sleep (also useless despite a million apps) and it was all over the place. Now there probably are some things that are still a wee bit stressful in my life but nothing like it used to be. All it did was yep, you guessed it – stress me out. But I also know that tiny bits of stress build up just like calories do. And I was the prize recipient of those effects in 2017. I learned not to ignore those little bits. This is why i journal (and make an attempt to do it every day) and I meditate. Addressing the stress is also a big benefit I get from IFS (Internal family systems) where I can find the “parts” that are responding to stress with a less than helpful response and work to change the response. Remember that the event or thing is not the stress. Our response to that event or thing is the stress. I will react (and then respond) to something differently than you. I also will most likely respond differently depending on what else is going on in my life. If you’re worried about one thing, or frazzled by some event(s), then something that normally doesn’t bother you will jump way high in the importance (and aggravation) scale. Aren’t there times when you don’t want to harm people when you’re stopped at a light? But other times you really want to speed through it and anything in your way. Find the practices that help you relax and also keep track of what stresses you’re experiencing- you can do that with an “emotion” log. In one column put the events of the day. And in the other column put how you responded and then if it’s not too much work, use the 3rd column to write down your emotions. See if you can detect patterns. Let us know what you use, if you do, to help keep your responses out of the stressful level. And also let us know if you’ve suffered the effects of too much stress. I am positive that everyone reading this has whether they know it or not (and whether they want to admit it). Make the practice fun and enjoyable.

Daily Gratitude: I’m sure you’ve seen the videos of 3 legged dogs (and sometimes even 2 legged) running around, playing as if nothing was wrong. Or better yet, some amazing humans born without legs becoming great wrestlers or keynote speakers. I will never forget one day I was in line behind a young man who had had amputations of both arms and he was in line at a store. He had no prostheses either. He could have just given up. All of these beings could have just given up. It reminded me to do what mothers do when they first see their babies – they count to see if their precious child has all 10 fingers and all 10 toes. The mom is so grateful when she sees them all there. But when they aren’t, she doesn’t just “put the baby back and get another one”. She loves what is there. That is what we should do too. That mom will find a way for her baby to overcome. She finds another way to fly. So when things seem wrong, remember something or someone you’ve seen in the past who’s been struggling but figured out a solution. Then tell yourself you can do that too. It may take a bit of thought and it may also take, God forbid, you asking for help, but you will find a way.

Daily Gratitude: Can you read this enough times that you understand it? I mean truly understand it. No, I’m not making fun of you. I just know from experience that it’s easy to read something without really seeing it. Most people think that excessive stress leads to illness and I agree. But often what leads to that excessive stress is the need to “get it done right now” (or yesterday would be better). It’s rushing from this activity to the next and then to another. No room to breathe. Are all these activities necessary? If they involve our kids, what are we really teaching them is important? Why do they have to be into everything? Is that healthy for them? I was just sitting here thinking about how I don’t feel great this morning (no, nothing major is wrong. I’m just old) and then I realized there could have been plenty of mornings when I felt that way in the past BUT I was always moving on to the next task. I never allowed myself to feel anything let alone not feel well. Of course that’s what landed me in the hospital for 5 weeks in 2017. I never stopped to think about what was going on in my life. Even the post shingles pain hadn’t made me stop to analyze that and let me tell you that pain was horrific and constant. How numb can we get ourselves? And then how dumb is it to be numb? In my case it was very dumb. I had missed all the signals and messages and there were many. I didn’t know how to slow down and be patient. So the universe taught me. Why don’t you look at your life and see where you could use a bit more patience? Then see what you can do about it? Hopefully preventing you from becoming a patient.