Daily Gratitude: How many of you remember this day 23 years ago? I don’t know about you but I can’t believe it was that long ago. It seems as if it all happened yesterday. What lessons can we take from that awful day? One might be regarding decisions. We all seem to get anxious and worried whenever we have some decision to make. What if we were to put our need to make a decision in perspective? Think about those people on the upper floors of the towers and the decision they had to make. “Do I stay here and die from smoke inhalation or burns. Or do I jump to my death?” How horrible does your personal dilemma seem now? You may say this is dramatic but that’s one of the most prominent thing I remember watching the events evolve – and the vocal cries from the men I was with as they shouted “oh no” or “oh my God” as they watched the TV. It was one of the most visceral parts of the day and there were certainly plenty of them. Next time you think things are getting rough, think back to that day. Take some time today to remember all those affected that day.

Daily Gratitude: It always amazes me when there’s a series of these quotes/sayings that fall into my lap and they are around the same topic. Believe me, I don’t seek them out. It’s for that reason that I just “go with the flow” when they do show up. I posted a quote in late July about not judging people based on just what you see since you have no clue what their “story” is. You must decide who you are and who you want to be. This requires examining deep inside to discover what your core beliefs are. And then to question whether they are really yours or just things you absorbed because people told them to you over and over as you were growing up. I know I was “taught” that i wasn’t worth anything and wasn’t good enough etc. it took me nearly 70 years to get in deep enough (and thank goodness I had help and had learned about IFS- Internal Family Systems) to discover that these were just things I’d been told. After all that is what a belief is – a thought you keep thinking over and over again. I had to ferret out each one and then look for evidence- evidence proving it was true or evidence proving it was false. It’s hard but we have to keep doing it. Things change and so do we. But it’s our responsibility to know ourselves, not to just accept what others say or think. Start by examining your core beliefs. Write them down. Then try to find the proof. This will take some time but it’s worth it.

Daily Gratitude: This follows nicely on yesterday’s post. I think we spend too much time trying to be what we think others want us to be. In the 80s I had a horrible experience at work which forced me to realize this. I’m sure I had been doing it for years but this was the first time I’d recognized it. It was like an out of body experience where I saw myself responding (maybe reacting is a better word) in one way to LCDR so and so and then moving to the next desk where CPT x was sitting and responding in a completely different manner. And so on. There was no Terrie in there. It was all about doing what the other person wanted me to do or be. Thank goodness I realized it and was able to make some changes to begin the process of being me. I’m still not there and it’s been 40 years but I’m a lot closer. So my advice to you is determine who you are and who you want to be and set out on that path. Do not be deterred. It’s your choice.