Daily Gratitude: The way to overcome fear is to take action. The more you remain immobile, the more time you have to worry and doubt. And what comes after worry and doubt is fear. They are all variations on one theme. Stand up, recognize your fear, break it down so you know what you’re really afraid of and then you’ll know which action(s) you need to take. Let me give you an example that I’m still working on. I’ve talked about it before. I do not like making phone calls or even talking on the phone. We were not allowed to be on the phone for more than 3 minutes as I was growing up. But that was a long time ago so what’s really behind this fear. One thing I have discovered and probably written about before is that on the phone I can’t use my other senses to try to figure out what’s going on with the other person. I can see them to see if they look bored or aren’t paying attention etc. so what? Well, those characteristics were apparently what I learned were the key to whether someone was bored with me or didn’t like me or thought I didn’t have anything useful to say, or think I’m not smart etc. I really need to see someone or else I don’t trust what i “hear”. Not sure that was clear but that’s why I’m still working on it. But I still need to take action and that takes an act of Congress for me to pick up the phone. The more I do it and realize that I’m not going to melt or have a meltdown just calling Verizon, the easier it will get. This is, I guess, the essence of exposure therapy. Are there any fears that you have that you’ve dug deep into? Do you know what you’re really afraid of? Work on that and then figure out a game plan. Solicit help from friends and family too. Sometimes just expressing the fear will help you realize there aren’t any ghosts in the closet. We can continue to work together.
