Daily Gratitude: You can interpret this several ways. I look at the rainbow with me right smack in the middle and my past is at one end and my future at the other. I choose to look at my past in a much more positive way than I did for decades. The facts will never change but how we look at them can change. And, actually, it’s possible that the “facts” we remember aren’t even truly accurate. As I’ve learned more about IFS (Internal Family Systems), I’ve been able to work with my various parts and learn about their interpretations of those “facts”. Now that I know that parts don’t grow older but are stuck at the age when they came into existence, it makes it so much easier to realize why they feel as they do. Along with that I know I can help them see “our” life in a different way, and as such, this can remove a great deal of anxiety. Something that once seemed unbearable (like another dinner where there’s the constant threat of “incoming”), can be understood because i can see how my father’s actions were intended in a much different way than I interpreted them. When you calm your nervous system, your peripheral vision returns and you see more than you ever thought you could. That rainbow really does have two pots of gold.

Daily Gratitude: We’re more than a week into March but i think this is a great way to look at it (and maybe every month). What if we decided that each month was a time of renewal and we could sweep away all the stuff that’s no longer of use? That would include and anger or worry we had. It’s a new slate so even if you think you made mistakes in that last month, they can be wiped away. The event may not be able to be wiped out but your response to it can be altered. See everything that happened as a piece of the puzzle of your life. If you’re putting together a jigsaw puzzle you need all the pieces to make sure you have the picture you are looking for. The same goes for all those “bad” things that hqppen. Change your view of them and change what they mean to you and your life

Daily Gratitude: I recommend a book by David Brooks (“How To Know a Person”). It is excellent and is a great way to start learning to harmonize with others. This is something sorely needed at this time of our lives. It seems there is total disharmony abd whether that’s your thing or not, it a danger to the human race. We are a tribal people. Disharmony is not conducive to survival for our species. I think that we use labels to depersonalize people. It’s “easier” to call someone a name than it is to provide evidence to support your position. How do you argue a label such as “you’re a jerk”? How do you refute “you’re an a*hoe”? Or even more – how do you argue “you don’t know what you’re talking about?” without being given specifics.? It’s too bad we can’t just discuss facts without getting so emotional. But the mere nature of some of these discussions means there’s a winner or a loser and no one wants to he the loser. What steps can you take to foster harmony in your family, your work or in any gathering you’re involved with ?