Daily Gratitude: “Invisible disability” is a real thing. So many millions (yes millions) of people have chronic pain or chronic illness that shows absolutely NO outward effect. “So what?” You ask. Well, the “what” is that these people are suffering more than you can imagine and their suffering is worsened by the fact that others either don’t recognize it or don’t believe it. They feel (and in many ways are) ALONE. it seems that we humans “require” visual evidence that something exists before we believe that it does exist. You’ve heard the expression “you’ll see it when you believe it”. That is a matter of faith. Most people operate under “I’ll believe it when I see it” and they treat the conditions that others say they have the same way – if you’re not bleeding, throwing up or have bones sticking out, then there’s nothing wrong with you. How sad is it that we don’t believe others when they say they are having pain. And doesn’t matter what kind of pain it is. It can be an emotional pain from depression or grieving for example or physical pain. Pain is pain and it hurts. Why are we so “immune” to accepting it in others? Have you ever examined that in yourself? Why do we have to have “proof” before we can extend kindness and compassion? Why do we demand that they “put on a happy face” and not complain? What is complaining anyway? If someone says “I don’t feel well”, why is that considered a complaint? Why do we demand they just “suck it up”? Who are we to be the judge and jury of whether or not another person is suffering? Aren’t we here to help others? Isn’t it our job to offer support to someone having trouble? How much effort does it take to just listen to someone and say “i believe you and cannot imagine what it must be like”? That’s not hard so why don’t we do more of that? Take some time to ask yourself these questions. Then take some time to think of people you know (and even ask them) and see if you can determine how they are really feeling. Once you ask them, you may be surprised.

Daily Gratitude: This is about as simple as it gets. And it’s so easy. But our busy lives keep us from doing it. Why? I think it’s because we feel as as if we have to actually do something that might involve a lot of effort. Often we really don’t have time to make that effort. So we feel that doing nothing is better than trying to do something else but not doing it very well. But just think about the last time you weren’t feeling your best. You checked your email or got a text or a voicemail and it was from a friend just saying “hi, thinking of you”. Nothing else. Just there 4 words. Didn’t those 4 words (or even just the last 3) make you feel better? Didn’t it take your mind off the loneliness or the suffering even if just for a short while? Then why can’t you do the same for someone else? Don’t be afraid you’ll get “sucked into” having a give more of yourself than you have time for. An email or a text can help prevent that. Just give a little bit. I guarantee it will make both parties feel better. Then you’ll wonder why you haven’t done it more often!

Daily Gratitude: Whenever I’m training for the upcoming Vol State race across Tennessee, I use a different and more hilly route (finding sufficient hills in San Antonio is tough). There is a man on the corner of a big intersection who is there every day hoping people will give him money. I’ve been pondering this for about 3 years now. He’s almost always there, no matter the weather. Picture this for a second: it’s pouring rain and you’re standing on concrete and people are zooming by splashing water on you, not necessarily intentionally but that’s just what happens when cars go through standing water. Or this: it’s 100 degrees (108 “real feel”) with 70% humidity and the sun is blazing down on you because there is no place to go. This man is not, in my opinion, just a pan handler trying to take advantage of people’s kindness. How do I know? I don’t for sure but he’s always there. This appears to be his “job”. He doesn’t call in sick when he doesn’t feel like boiling. He doesn’t go on vacation. This is his livelihood. He can’t say “I don’t feel like it” and not show up. It’s taken me all this time (I’m ashamed to admit) to realize that he works harder than I do and even harder than almost everyone I know. He has some sort of disability because he’s bent over at a 90 degree angle all the time (and I actually saw him get off a bus and head to his spot and he was just as bent over, holding on to his walker) so he probably can’t work at another job. I don’t know. I do know that he shows great resilience and I’ve come to respect him because he’s been out there when I have and we’ve both been miserable. But I am headed home and he’s still standing there. He depends on the kindness of others. How would you do in that situation? Yesterday I finally went over to his side of the road (it’s opposite the side I walk on) and told him he was always out there and I respected him for that. And I gave him some money. I should have given more but more importantly I should have talked with him more. But I didn’t because I wasn’t sure he would want to talk to me (weird huh ) and I wasn’t sure if talking to me would keep him from getting more donations (notice how we use words – when we give to a formal charity we call it a donation. When we give to a person in need we call it a hand out – why the difference?). He’s no longer just the man on the corner. He’s Joe-Joe and he has the sweetest smile. He’s now a man I’ve met and would like to get to know better.