Don’t Be a Leaf Blower

Terrie’s Tip – Don’t be so concerned with how you look when compared to others. Be cognizant of how you can help others in any way possible before you start “cleaning up your own lawn”

Yesterday on my walk I was hit withthe realization that a “relaxing” weekend for many people was not relaxing at all.

I was met with a cacauphony of sounds – weed wackers, lawn mowers, leaf blowers. I gazed in awe at this Broadway play involving mechanical characters that were ruling their masters without the masters even knowing it. I was saddened especially when I saw people watering their lawns but that’s another whole subject.

Leaf blowers are kind of like the noise of the tires on the road for me. There would be no need to put me in isolation were I in jail. Just play an audio with those sounds and I would surely become insane much more rapidly than isolation would produce.

I see no purpose to the leaf blowers other than to make your yard look good while cluttering up others or the street or anywhere you can shoo the leaves away. I understand that some people use the blowers to get the leaves in one pile (better than raking) so they can discard them. I imagine this happens but in all this time I’ve been walking nearly every day I have not found that to be the case. People are hired to tend someone’s lawn and to make it look nice they turn on this obnoxiously loud machine, move it all around like a pistol (or other object I can’t say here) and make sure the lawn they are responsible for is clean and looks nice. The street or the neighbor’s yards? Oh, well, sorry.

It made me wonder how often we insensitive humans behave like leaf blowers. You read and hear about “how to get ahead” and “how to be number one” and on and on and it’s all about “how can I either be better or if i can’t be better, how can I look better?” We, especially in America seem to forget that we are a social animal. I mean even our “social” media can be consumed and participated in alone. Figure that one out for me.

We need to either let the leaves be on our lawn because they probably fell from our trees or we need to use some more controlled manner to scoop them up and discard them – not all over the street and other people’s yards. If you make sure you look clean and like you’re the best and you’re number one, just wait til the next storm and see a) how many more leaves fall back down so you have to restart the process or even funnier b) how many leaves you blew into the neighbor’s yards came back to yours.

During the pandemic I think we did a better job of trying to take care of others and not just ourselves and I think we need to continue that behavior. Not only remembering the Golden Rule but also helping others FIRST – clean their yard before you get to yours. They may need more help than you know.

Sorry to ramble but I think we just want our lives to look perfect without really caring what others experience. We need to keep up the good work we started in this past year and make it a habit. Looking out for others is always better and ultimately more fruitful than looking out for yourself.

Sorry for the rant

Are You Living Like an Elephant?

Terrie’s Tip – Don’t stay chained up like an elephant. Break free and feel empowered.

Fully grown elephants weighing many tons appear docile and never try to run away when they are only held back by a relatively small chain and peg in the ground. Why?

Because they are trained like that when they are young. This happens when they are small enough that the chain will hold them. But they never realize as they grow that they definitely outweigh that same chain and could easily break away.

So many of us are stuck in a belief system and with thoughts/ideas that were engrained in us as little children. These continued to be reinforced as we became toddlers then teens and because they were things we heard over and over again, they became “the gospel” for us. Never questioned, never even thought about. We’ve grown and are out of that environment/house and are in a position where we can examine our ideas and beliefs and change them.

But if we never even think to question something, we are just as much a prisoner as the gigantic elephant. Maybe your family taught that certain people were not as good as others and as you grew it was repeated over and over again. You never even bothered to question if that was really true or not. Why not break through the chain and re-evaluate all the things you learned as a child.

I had that experience several years ago. I had been raised to believe that one political party was the “only” political party. And i really could have cared less – all i cared about when i was growing up was becoming a doctor. The rest of the world didn’t exist. But if someone asked which party I supported, i would simply parrot the one my parents told me was correct.

Then my father died and a few years later I was talking to my mother and she shocked me and told me she was supporting someone from the other party for president. I was shocked. I asked why and her reason made sense. And you know what? I finally asked questions, did research and broke my “elephant chain” and realized she was right and that what I had been taught all my life did not align with what I really believed. That was an eye opener to me but it is a perfect example of this.

Take a look at what beliefs might be chained around your leg. I find it easier to really figure things out if you know someone who exemplifies what you’re trying to take a look at. It’s easier because you actually see a human being and not just an object/concept. I know a lot of people who are homophobic until they find out who in their lives are gay. Then it doesn’t seem to matter as much because it’s what that person represents that matters, not what label is placed on him/her. Open your mind and investigate everything. This is Pride month so it’s a good time to check out the entire gender issue. There are so many different variations now that I am not even familiar with them all and am going to use this month to find out more about it.

What’s your elephant chain?

Reframe It!

Terrie’s Tip – Instead of saying “Why is this happening TO me?” try saying “Why is this happening FOR me?” You’ll be amazed how changing just one word will rewire your brain and your attitude. It’s no longer “I’m a victim” but “Oh, the universe is giving me a gift! Maybe I should unwrap it”

Reframing is simple but again not always easy – especially when times seem tough. In all the reading I’ve done in the past 3 weeks (I’m so happy I’ve ‘consumed’ 18 books in 3 1/2 weeks – consumed means reading and listening), I learned that another way to reframe positively is to say “demands” instead of “stressful events/things”. Stress is a response to a demand. It’s not an event itself. Who cares? Because it means that you actually have control over what is going on with you. The demand is a benign thing that is not out to get you or hurt you or anything. It’s how you respond that will affect you. And you control how you respond. There are so many ways to help calm your nervous system which is what we’re really talking about here. Breathing techniques, expressive writing, awareness etc.. There are so many guides out there for you to look at.

When you reframe how you say things, that is a way of managing/controlling your response.

“Why is this happening TO me?” bemoans the events and all that is associated with it. You probably can’t really answer the question so why waste time and energy trying to find out. It will just make you feel worse.

“Why is this happening FOR me?” makes your brain excited and thinking it did actually receive a gift. It wants to know more and will investigate. Positive questions produce positive results. When you start to investigate the possible good that might come out of this “event”, you can actually get excited. I will tell you and this is one of the great benefits of age, everything really does happen for a reason and it always works out. It may not seem like it and we are such a world of instant gratification that we are not used to waiting for something to manifest. It’s a good thing we are not the universe’s gardeners. Nothing would ever bloom. You can help produce a better result by focusing on the good that could possibly come out of this. What lessons are you learning? What information are you getting from this that might help you in the future?

See how you can reframe other things in your life. Things really are happening FOR you!

Terrie