Daily Gratitude: This may seem a strange post to make when the country is so chaotic.

But I think that’s when we need to talk about this the most.

Remember to control the controllables- and feeling happy now is one of the things we can control – even if we think it’s dependent on external things.

It’s not.

I hear this a lot – “I’ll be happy WHEN…..” – you can fill in the blanks.

It could be “when I lose weight or when I weigh x number of pounds”; or, “when I have a better job (I ask then what does ‘better’ mean to you); or, when I’m rich (same question- what does ‘rich’ mean to you?); or, when I’m retired; or, when I’m married.

You get the picture.

This is sad but it took me so many years to realize it.

What if those things never happen?

Does that mean you’ll never be happy?

That’s pretty discouraging to think about. It shouldn’t take much to be happy.

I think that doing a journey run like vol state helps you understand what we really need in life and that all the other stuff is just fluff.

Just a few things sustain us for 10 days. Food and drink, sleep and surprisingly kindness.

It’s the kindness that everyone we met showered us with that really sustained us.

It was just a word or a wave.

It didn’t even have to be something tangible like water or a snack.

Just the love they showed could lift your spirits and get you through the next few miles.

So, if you find yourself falling into the “when I” trap, look around you and ask “am I happy right now?”

Maybe even prompt yourself “am I in pain? Am I comfortable? Am I thirsty or hungry? Can I get in out of the elements if I need to? Do I have someone who loves me? Do I have someone I love (and it is any kind of love, not necessarily romantic)? Do I have unfulfilled needs? If so, what can I do to solve these issues?”

You probably are happy now but just aren’t paying attention to it.

What if you’re not here tomorrow?

Do you want to leave this earth simply wanting something else or do you want to leave appreciating all you have NOW?

Daily Gratitude: This is a big concept they taught me in the death doula course. To go into a situation with a know nothing mindset. This leaves you open to anything. You can expand your mind so much easier when you think you know nothing.

You’re judgement free and what better way to open your arms and accept whatever comes along. After all, you’re not the expert in someone else’s life are you? You may think you know more than they do but you can’t actually decide what’s best for someone if you haven’t or aren’t in their shoes.

Your external circumstances may be similar but I’ll bet that you have no clue what their upbringing and past were like and that’s what really determines how they are going to respond to something. So judgment is useless. Besides unless they specifically ask for your advice or thoughts, maybe you should just listen…and be open to whatever you hear.

Having a “know nothing” mind will actually enrich your life, not stifle it like making your opinions the important thing will.

Make a conscious effort when you go into a new environment or relationship. Go in like a child with all the curiosity of that child. You’ll be amazed at how much you’ll learn.

Daily Gratitude: I don’t totally agree with this because I think there are things you can do (such as a gratitude journal) that can actually make you feel better.

The basic concept here though is to not wait. Don’t wait until you feel “like it” to take action on something. Do it regardless of how you feel and then see what happens to your feelings later.

As I’ve said before, Nike got it right and it’s the only “bumper sticker” saying that I think is worth it – just do it! Who can argue with that.

Most of the time, once you start to do something, your feelings about it will change. Once one little feeling starts to make a turn around, the other feelings will begin to participate in the party. It’s not as simple as that but I just wanted to lighten things up.

Has that ever happened to you? If so, tell us about it