Daily Gratitude: Go ahead and pat yourself on the back for all you’ve achieved- even if there’s no award for that particular thing.
I pat myself on the back every time I pick up the phone without taking hours, days or weeks, to decide to do so. I congratulate myself when I go somewhere and don’t have all the horrible anxiety I used to have.
These are tiny things to the world but they they are major accomplishments to me. And who cares about the rest of the world when you’re trying to feel good.
Most people don’t know what you struggle with and you probably don’t want to tell them what it is. That’s ok as long as you recognize it yourself and can stand up proud when you overcome it even if for just a short moment.
Make a success journal or jar and put down everything (and I mean everything) that you feel good about. Why? So you can refer back to these successes whenever you’re feeling down or as if you’ve failed at something. We all need reminders.
Stand up tall! Stick out your chest and yell (even if it’s only in your mind) “I DID IT”. Then smile as if it’s your biggest secret ever. And it will be. But at least you’re smiling!
Daily Gratitude: Here’s another affirmation for you.
First ask yourself how you adapt to change. Or maybe first is do you adapt or do you resist to the end?
You have to know how you react or respond before you can hope to change that. The goal here is to minimize your resistance to change since that only increases anxiety and prolongs your becoming “ok” with the change (ideally you’ll become comfortable).
Saying these affirmations helps rewire the neural circuits in your brain. But as with all affirmations, you need to accompany them with action.
So ask yourself what small action you can take that will reinforce your affirmation. Perhaps it’s just taking time to imagine what good things could possibly come from this change. That may seem difficult but if you make it a game and divest yourself from the results and just do it for fun, it might be easier. Go for outrageous ideas, ideas that make you laugh because you know that won’t happen. When you go in with that attitude, anything else might be acceptable.
They’re doing some sort of construction on the trail I walk on. I don’t like it. But I have no control over that (they never asked me darn it). So to follow my own advice, I’ve imagined them finding major archaeological findings as they dig. Big bones, dinosaur skeletons. That made me laugh.
Daily Gratitude: Be like a turtle, stick your neck out. I came across this concept from someone who was trying to explain that it’s ok to make mistakes.
They said that we should embrace those mistakes and instread of receding and pulling into our shamed self-centered world, we should look for the opportunity or gift in them
This is similar to the ancient teaching that in every adversity there is a seed of equivalent benefit. It was popularized by Napoleon Hill but it goes back even further.
Whenever you make a mistake, you can acknowledge it and if it affected someone else apologize for it but otherwise shake it off and say “what now?
What can I make of this?
How can I turn this into something wonderful?
Often when you make a mistake, your natural response Is to run away and hide.
You’re embarrassed and you just know people will think badly of you and oh, how they’ll talk.
Even though this is a natural reaction, work hard to overcome that and stand up straight, letting others know that you’re human too.
It probably will strengthen whatever connection you have with the people you’ve foundered in front of.
This becomes easier if you let go of outcomes and cultivate a flexible mindset.
When you’re not so attached to a partciular outcome, you can be freer and can accept whatever happens.
Sure, you should still have goals.
This is not license to just give up.
It’s simply encouragement to realize you can make something good out of that which initially appears bad.
I can’t do this but think of someone you know who is a good cook and can take anything sitting in the refrigerator, no matter what it looks like, add it to other ingredients and come out with something that’s actually pretty tasty. The only outcome that person is attached to is to not make others sick.
Sure that person would like it to taste good and will put all their skills into doing that but if it doesn’t taste the way someone else thought it was going to, then that’s not a big problem. Next time the cook may try something else. It’s not the end of the world.
That’s where the turtle part comes in. Turtles can’t make any progress unless they stick their necks out.
When they’ve pulled the head inside they are protecting themselves. We may laugh because turtles look so funny but you know what.
We do the same thing.
We withdraw to protect ourselves too.
Why not vow to be a turtle and stick your neck out when there’s something you’d really like to do but before today, you’d shy away from it because a) you didn’t know if you could do it. Well you didn’t know you could walk when you were a baby either did you and b) you’re afraid of other people’s reactions if you were to try and fail.
Think back to when you had a burning desire to do something and nothing could get in your way.
Did you think about what other people were thinking then? Heck no. So why are you using that as an excuse now?
Why not have a turtle day which could lead to a turtle week and maybe even a turtle month…and then god forbid maybe a turtle life!
Take a day and say “I’m not going to be afraid of anything. I’m just going to do what I’ve wanted to do and not worry about other people.
