We’ve talked about this before but it’s so important. I think it’s the primary cause of conflict between people. Each person has their own interpretation of what happens even if they are all standing watching the same thing.

Why is that? Because how we interpret things is determined by our experiences. Remember that your brain is a gigantic super computer. From the time you’re born (and probably even before that), your brain is collecting data – on everything. Then it associates that data with how you respond/react. It will interpret your response and then categorize events and situations that are similar as dangerous or safe. Of course there are variations of this but your brain is pretty black and white when it comes to preservation.

People who felt safe all the while they were growing up and didn’t really have a lot of trauma in their life will not “freak out” at the same thing a person who had a difficult and traumatic childhood will. All because the first person’s brain didn’t experience much that it considered dangerous whereas the other person had plenty of experiences that their brain raised the alarm on.

Cars zooming by one person can set them into an anxiety attack whereas another person doesn’t even notice. What’s the difference? Maybe the first person grew up in a crime ridden location where robberies and assaults took place constantly and all were accompanied by loud noisy getaway cars.

If you want to learn about yourself, next time you have some sort of reaction to an event, take some time to see if you can track down a prior experience that bothered you. Get into the habit of seeing if you can associate reactions with past events. That way you can identify them and then teach your brain that they are no longer “dangerous” events. It takes time but it’s worth the effort.