I’m sure you have all heard the story about the man on the subway who was really upset with another passenger – this other guy had 3 kids and they were running around all over the subway car, making noise and generally causing havoc. The father just sat there and did nothing to control his kids.

Finally, the irritated man went over and said something to the father, who acted startled, thought for a minute and then replied “Oh, I’m so sorry. We came from the hospital where their mother just died and I guess I was too distracted to pay attention.”

Needless to say, the irritated passenger’s thoughts and tone changed dramatically when he heard that.

The same thing happened to me today and taught me once again to ask questions before making judgements.

The clinic that’s closest to my hospital is where I go to get my meds and labs drawn because it’s convenient. Well, several months ago the lab switched to appointment only. This made me feel like the irritated passenger in the story above. I had to make an appointment to get my labs done this week and the appointment was for mid morning today – thereby interfering with my walking regimen..How dare they? ha ha.

It really isn’t a problem but as you can probably figure out since most of you know me – it was a CHANGE – one of those things I’m not fond of …another ha ha..I certainly could adjust my schedule around this. But….it was just the “principle” – and I think that probably the principle that was violated was that they didn’t ask me…not a very good principle to stand by.

So, as I sat there awaiting my “appointment” I was simmering and wanted to ask the tech why they switched to an appointment. But since I am always afraid of rejection, I debated the wisdom of doing that. Boy, am I glad I got brave.

I asked.

I left humbled.

There were two reasons. One didn’t impress me at all. The second impacted my thoughts significantly.

The first reason was that the other places were switching to appointments and so the people at those places who didn’t want to wait for an appointment were flooding into this clinic’s lab – making the wait time excessively long and stressful for the staff. Ok, so just because another place is doing it doesn’t impress me as a valid reason for them doing it. However, if i get my emotions out of the way, i would assume the higher ups evaluated it and felt it was a better business practice – even if they still didn’t ask me.

Then the tech told me she’d been having significant health problems since early January of this year starting with Covid and then developing into severe anxiety. She said she told the bosses that if she could come back, she couldn’t come with the lines being so long but that she could probably handle an appointment system. This is a one person shop and it has been compounded by a new military electronic health record system which has driven many a person mad in the 9-10 months it’s been in effect.

When she was telling me all that happened, I changed my thoughts completely …and immediately. I could understand it and was so happy there was something that enabled her to continue working and feeling useful.

All that simmering for nothing. Another lesson learned – actually a few lessons especially about the “parts” of me that think the world has to clear everything with me before doing something. Then there’s the “part” that thinks everything that doesn’t follow my “schedule” is an inconvenience and wrong. and so on. See how parts work? They run your life and your mind without even realizing it. Think about what’s bothering you and see if you can figure out why.

Be kind to others and be grateful if you can do something to help them feel worthwhile.